I am constantly amazed at how God uses the small things for His glory. Take my hair for instance. I never thought that God would use my hair to facilitate a heart change inside myself, but He did.
I have been coloring my hair since I was in my mid twenties. Like my mother did before me, I fell victim to an onset on premature grey. The horror of it all! Well, needless to say, it didn't take long before I was introduced to Mr. HairColor aka: Operation cover up. Yes, Mr. HC and I had developed quite a relationship over the years. I felt him to be quite effective in covering up the unsightly sight of grey! I always looked forward to our time together.
And for the record, let me say that I never, EVER considered allowing my grey to grow out. I would rather have had a tooth pulled than to give up hair color. Maybe a even a few teeth if desperate enough.
Well, God changed everything - like He always does.
It just so happens that in this time of my life, I have really been seeking more intimacy with God. I have been asking for more of Him, that he make himself more and more real to me...
"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you". Matt 7:7
And so he responded to me in a way that I thought was quite bizarre and, well sort of annoying.
I was in front of the mirror one day, with my hair color in hand- ready to do my thing.
That's when I heard a voice. Not a booming voice, but a quiet voice inside myself; my heart. The voice said:
"Don't color your grey. Let it grow."
I have to say, I was quite taken back by this. Why would I even think such a thing. This was nuts. There was no way I was going to stop coloring my hair, EVER! I had to face those pesky little grey roots on a frequent basis, and let me tell you, they were not at all attractive!
After a quick minute of pondering this hair-brain idea, I happily opened the box and commenced to coloring my hair. I must also say that I was quite happy to do so, with no regret.
In the interim of hair colorings, I continued seeking God's face- asking for more of Him. Praying that I could lose myself in His love and come to know His will for my life. I was asking for Him to make me hungry for what He wanted in my life. More of Him, less of me...
Then came the time once more for Operation Cover-Up. As usual, I purchased my hair color and found myself, as usual standing in front of the mirror prepping for the procedure. That is when it happened again. I heard the voice. Not booming and loud, but still and soft.
"Don't color your grey. Let it grow."
I found it hard to ignore the voice this time; I knew that it was definitely not coming from the own desires of my heart! So I decided to say a prayer and ask for clarity and understanding. I did think it was a bit silly; praying about my hair. After all, there were so many other things that God was busy with, right? What was the big deal about my hair? Almost instantly after praying for understanding, a word invaded my head. The word was, IDOL. In that moment, it all became very clear. My hair had become an idol in my life; something that I was putting before God. In coloring my hair, I felt I had to hide a part of myself from others that I didn't think would be accepted or looked upon very favorably. My grey in essence had become something I was ashamed of! Somethiing I felt I had to keep secret. God doesn't want us to feel this way. He wants to liberate and free us from such thinking. This whole situation had nothing to do with my hair, but had everything to do with my heart!
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will. ~Romans 12:2
It is true that we become a slave to that which we feel we can not live without. God doesn't want us to be a slave to anything. He wants to set us free from those things that are only temporal and focus on whats eternal. God wants us to find our identity through Him! He wants us to rid our hearts of those things that are destructive and replace those things with His perfect love, purpose and plan that he has for our lives.
Will I ever color my hair again? I might, but probably not! Honestly, I quite like the grey!
I know now that I don't need to cover the grey to feel "like" myself or to feel beautiful or accepted. I can be who God made me to be; a beautiful creation and reflection of His love and goodness!
So ladies and men, let's challenge ourselves, always! Let's continually ask God to remove anything in our lives that would hinder or prevent us from moving into a deeper relationship with Him. For He really does cares about even the smallest details in our lives!
I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ~Jeremiah 29:11
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